There are no words

Wow, I am so proud to go to this school. That’s quality right there.

…Not.

When a pact is broken

This semester I’m taking a junior writing class, one of the required core classes for psychology. Basically we just write papers about meaningless cognitive psychology crap and our teacher plays mind games with us. I’m pretty sure that most of you are familiar with the concept of peer review. If, by chance you’ve missed the memo, peer review or editing is when you get in small groups and edit other peoples papers. Yeah, it’s a good time.

Today was not like any other day I’ve experienced in my entire history of peer editing. Today a pact was broken and it’s going to be something that takes me many hours and dollars in therapy to get over.

There is this, how shall I put it correctly, Man-Student in my particular section of junior writing. He can only be described as having some type of slow personality mental disorder in combination with a fatal dose of monotonality (yes, I believe I just made that word up). When the teacher asks a simple question, like “How do you site this source?” the Man-Student will proceed to give you so much detail as actually counting out how many spaces between each word and how many spaces the second line should be indented, and so on. He’ll tell you what letters need to be capitalized and turn what should be a simple answer into the longest, most drawn-out explanation in the history of citations. In short, it’s bad to have to listen to it. And he does it for everything. Sadly, it’s not unlikely that the class will secretly snicker as the Man-Student tries to sound intelligent to his younger counterparts.

Now, I feel bad for the Man-Student as much as the next guy because he obviously has issues. This is all fine and dandy as long as there’s a good distance of space between us, you know, an appropriate distance that is allowed by the restraining order I filed against him because I’m scared for my life.

Anyway, back to peer editing. Normally when this time comes around we students like to stick to groups that we’ve previously been in; it’s just sort of an unwritten rule. The last peer review group I had was with three other cool people. In our group we made a pact: it will always be the same people. Really simple, not hard to understand or anything. Everyone agreed. And today, let me just say it was different.

One of the guys that was in the original group deserted the 3 of us. Left us high and dry. Left us to suffer. And so, you guessed it, we got stuck with Man-Student who somehow found a way to sneak into our tightly pressed-together desks and join our group. You’re thinking “Who cares?” or “So what?” right? Well, no! It was a big deal. This guys paper was nothing of what it should have been; it was practically twice the length of the requirement and really had nothing to do with cognitive psychology and when it was finished being read left me seriously saying “What?” out loud.

All the things you think would be impossible to be included in a paper about cognitive psychology Man-Student somehow found a way to include. Like what? Like Adam and Eve, like going in-depth talking about some painting. The assignment was to explain a phenomenon that occurs in cognitive psychology. Sounds simple, right? It should be simple. But, somehow Man-Student’s paper made me even more confused about top-down or bottom-up whateveryoucallit processing than when I started (and I knew nothing about it to start).

What Man-Student couldn’t comprehend about PEER EDITING is that in the group, the other people are supposed to comment and show constructive criticism to make the paper better. Yeah, he didn’t get that. One of my friends in the group, I’ll call him Fred, tried to make a suggestion that maybe this paper was a tad too long and a bit confusing. Man-Student didn’t accept that. It was probably the worst demonstration of insecurity I have ever seen. There was an argument; a big one. At one point, everyone in the class had stopped what they were doing to witness this heated debate about whether Man-Student’s paper was written in size 10 or 12 font Times New Roman. Knives were whipped out, daggers were thrown. I think Man-Student even killed a kid with a trident.

There are two morals to this story: first, don’t mess with man-students. And second, ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS respect the pact made in peer editing groups.

Reasons Why I Cannot Wait To Move

Ever since I was a tiny baby I’ve moved around. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever lived in the same place for more than 4 years. In 21 years of life that is a lot of moving, especially considering some people at this school have not even left the good old state of Massachusetts.

Anyway in 3 years at the same school (gasp!) I have lived in 2 dorms and 1 apartment. The dorms were just plain disgusting. I mean the type of disgusting where the Resident Assistants have to post signs on the door of the bathroom that look like this:

Ok, so after those 2 obligatory dorm-living years were over I made the great decision to move to a nearby apartment complex with my wonderful boyfriend. He had already been living in this particular apartment for 2 semesters so it was an easy move; we didn’t have to waste time searching for an apartment or anything like that. The only problem we encountered was that it is a 3 bedroom, and only being 2 people, we would need another person or else pay the extra rent, with was out of the question. So, we posted an ad and got 1 response; we got our third person. Yippee. I think we all know how that turned out because I posted about it yesterday.

Next semester Scott and I are getting our very first 2 bedroom apartment. And I’m so excited about it. With all that said, I can’t wait to move because:

-If there is a mess it will be our mess.
-When we come in at night we can turn out the lights.
-I think that somehow we will be able to bond even more through cleaning the bathroom and such things.
-I will be living with the most wonderful and handsome man. Ever. Don’t think I’m kidding.
-The new place will allow us to flush a toilet while the shower is running without the person in the shower screaming loudly at the top of their lungs. That would be cool.
-Maybe I will unpack all my stuff, instead of having boxes stacked in the closet ready to move at a moment’s notice.
-Organization.
-A cute tablecloth and maybe slipcovers for the sofa.
-Our own decorations.
-Maybe it will be cozy and cute, instead of living in something that can only be described as a cardboard house with stark-white walls.
-Dare I say it…. Painted walls??

I’m sure the list will grow and I will keep you updated.

Things That Go Through My Head While Sitting In Behavioral Endocrinology

(chronicled this morning)

Ok, it’s 8:05 why aren’t we starting yet? But on the other hand, take as looooooong as you’d like.

How does that girl in front of me get her hair that layer-ey? I should take a picture of it. Stealthily of course.

Kind sir, will you please speak ENGLISH?!

What?

Huh?!

The prerequisite for this class should be Behavioral Rocketscience.

Haha, she just spilled her coffee.

Ok, where does ephinepherine fit in to all of this?

This hot chocolate is good. 2 packets is definitely how it’s going to be made from now on.

Are you sure this is common knowledge?

“This should all be very simple and straightforward” oh go fuck yourself. In the nicest way possible, of course.

I really like this professor, I wish he taught something interesting.

…Still holding out to eat those gummy bears in my bag…

If I don’t look at it that huge picture of a goiter will dissapear from the screen. Ok GO.

I hear that there is a library at this place. I hear they have tutors.

Oh, bother.

Good times. Definitely.